B SOUP: You look so good it hurts sometimes.

~~Sometimes~~ Everytime I go shopping in-store, I turn into a total weirdo and get this feeling of anxiety mixed with excitement and I talk to myself in my head to calm and collect my racing mind- "Okay, Bethany. Just take it one rack at time, piece by piece, section by section." I square my eyes, tune everything else out, and try to act like I've been to a mall before. The thought of overlooking that one perfect item amidst the mass of merchandise overwhelms me to no end. And although I always go into my excursions with some kind of budget in mind, I take it out of the equation for the time being as to not impede any dressing room hopefuls. Once I have covered every foreseeable corner, I head to the dressing room in hopes that half of the clothes won't fit since I now have quadruple what I was looking to spend hanging on one wrist alone. However, when this does not happen and I MUST have it all, my anxiety turns to anger. I scowl as I am forced to weed through my pile and discard things that I'd do anything not to part with. I stomp to the cashier with my fists clenched and am in a rotten mood for the next couple of hours. I believe there is a term for this behavior- it's called...BRATTY. Well sooo what. I love them okay?? I could see our future together! Online shopping is just as overwhelming (if not more) because the options are endless, but I am far less anxious while doing it. Unlike a store, where I drive away knowing everything I tried on will be gone by the next time I return, online shopping obviously affords me the opportunity to continually check on what I want and make sure it's still available. While I always have a countless number of clothes I'd like to purchase, these are the one's I want so bad it hurts.